How do we solve a problem like Richy and Muani? Will RDZ make changes for Everton? Will Solanke be back?

Inside the Episode:

• The Romero Farce: Why are we celebrating a £250k-a-week captain for simply staying in the building? Plus, why Kevin Danso remains the man for the job.
• The Loan Churn: We look at the graveyard of our youth academy and ask why only Noni Madueke ever made it out alive.
• Room 101: We banish George Foreman-style parental narcissism to the abyss.
• Feet of Clay: The legendary Robbie Keane and his multinational franchise of childhood dreams.

With Simon Lipson, Julie Welch, Lee Brown & Kev Acott

COYS THFC

Inside the Episode:

• The Tel Paradox: Scores a worldie then attempts aogic-defying defensive acrobatics.
• The Snail and the Ghost: Richy and Muani offered as much threat as a pair of toddler’s safety scissors. We break down the dismal bluntness of a frontline that seems to be running in quicksand.
• Pointless Spite: A 22k-follower account wanted West Ham to win just to spite Arsenal? We discuss why prioritizing Goon hate over Premier League survival is a one-way ticket to a head-wobble.
• Room 101: We bin the "sacred" plastic badge on the floor and re-admit Lange and Vinai.
• Feet of Clay: This week it’s Edgar Davids, Gareth Bale and Lucas Moura.

With Simon Lipson, Julie Welch and Lee Brown

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In this episode:

• The Stand-outs: "Three-Lungs" Gallagher’s relentless engine, VDV’s return to godhood, and the surprising silkiness of the Bentancur-Palhinha pivot.
• RDZ's "Miracle" Speech: We discuss Roberto’s rallying cry to silence the "negative inner voice", avoiding medical team excuses, and how beating Villa would not be a miracle.
• Integrity or Insult? Was it a "lame surrender" from Villa, or are we finally seeing the brand-saving potential of players in the right positions playing with belief and confidence?
• Danso vs. Romero: We ask if Kevin Danso’s calm intelligence and brute strength are exactly what we need for the run-in, as opposed to the cultured chaos of Cuti.
• Transfer Cobblers: Sifting through the Robertson rumours; Vicario-to-Inter "agreement"; and why are we being linked with an out of contract Bournemouth player?

Plus: A trip to Room 101 for Joachim Löw's nasal habits and our search for the very essence of Spurs.

Next up: Leeds. If we win, dare we utter the S-word?

#COYS #THFC #NiceOneCyril

On the Menu:

• The Injury Curse: Solanke out, Xavi out. Is the medical team to blame (spoiler alert: no), are refs letting opponents turn our boys into mincemeat, or is something else at play?

  The Muani Hill: RDZ is prepared to die on it, but we’re ready to move to Tel Mountain. We break down the Mathys Tel necessity.

• Kinsky’s Redemption: From the Madrid nightmare to a masterclass of composure and brilliance at Wolves. Is this the end of Flappy?

• Room 101: The Cliche Clearance: We’re burning the footballing lexicon to the ground and ripping half and half scarves in half.

Plus daft tweets, Villa, irreverence, laughs, therapy. It's all here.

With Simon Lipson, Julie Welch, Kev Acott and cat-loving Stephen Pollard.

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But between Pedro Porro’s positional amnesia, the threat of a Flappy return and the ongoing Muani mystery, we’ve still got plenty to moan about.

Julie Welch, Kev Acott and Dave Bradshaw join Simon Lipson to deep-dive the pros and cons of our performance and so much else.

We look into our passing problem, why digital wayfinding is just what we needed at this difficult time, and the goons make it to Room 101 (not a moment to soon). As does...Pat Nevin. It'll all make sense. Honestly.

Irreverence, analysis, laughs, therapy.

Let's get into it!

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One point from twenty-four, a squad that treats a football like a live wasp, and a new manager already looking crestfallen.

We dissect the Sunderland disaster, ponder the Muani prank, revisit Lange’s January negligence and ask why Richy connects with the ball with all the thudding authority of a polite cough in a library.

We also dive into the Romero riddle: were those tears for the club, or just the realization that his knee may have sabotaged his World Cup?

RDZ has inherited a flooding building and brought in new coaches to try and fix the plumbing, but is it just too late?

With Simon Lipson, Julie Welch, Kev Acott and Eady Hurley.

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With only seven games to save the season, we ask: will he stay if we go down, or will he flounce out the moment he spots a carton of UHT milk in the canteen?

Also in this episode:

• Financial Fair Play-ish: Digging through the £94.7m loss—where did that "£100m war chest" go?

• The Mikey Moore Mystery: Why was the club quieter than a library about his health issues?

• Academy Watch: Are our loanees "desperately average" or just resting?

• The Art of the Text: Kev’s guide to the "Calculated Mock"—when exactly is it safe to ruin a friend’s weekend?

Plus, we induct the "USA-isation" of football and the phrase "I was today years old" into Room 101.

Featuring the legendary Julie Welch, the eternally miserable-yet-optimistic Kev Acott, and actor and wannabe social media star, Lee Brown

COYS.

We discuss Ange revisionism and the board's troubling naivity. Plus Room 101 and our brand new and slightly pointless Guess The Ex-Spurs Player game.

Loads more besides.

Laughs, irreverence, therapy.

With Simon Lipson, Julie Welch, Kev Acott and Rob White.

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Simon Lipson, Julie Welch, Kev Acott and Barry Graham talk “nothing” goals, baffling substitutions, Porro’s positioning, Romero’s shuffling and whether Micky has lost a yard.

There’s also the small matter of the pre-match hype and whether it iserved only to heap pressure on the boys and inspire the opposition.

With 30 points from 31 games and Igor still searching for a league win, this has to be the end of his tenure. Surely?

Room 101, a Churchill impression, a cod-Scottish accent (and a real one) and loads of passion.

Bleak, baffled, but still here. Therapy for Spurs fans.

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- The Atletico masterclass

- Imperious Archie

- Tricky Tel, rock-solid Radu, sparkly Simons

- Bergvall back and firing

- Forest six-pointer

Quick therapy for Spurs fans.

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First up: the Atlético Madrid horror show, Kinsky's studless boots, Igor ’s icy touchline snub.

Then a look at the gritty draw with Liverpool — signs of life, or just another brief flicker?

With a huge game against Nottingham Forest looming, we ask whether Spurs can finally produce two decent performances in a row.

Plus: Vinai throws Levy under a fleet of buses, conspiracy theories, Room 101, and there are tales of mistaken identity to rival Igor's random bald man cuddle.

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Simon Lipson, Julie Welch, Kev Acott and Dave Bradshaw pick through the debris.

The Red Card Club: Micky follows Romero into the changing room showers. Is his mind mush? Are the players scared by the scrutiny? Is there a mental health issue?

The Great Escape: Solanke to Newcastle, Vic to Italy - anywhere will do - Micky to Barca. Will it be a transfer window or a closing-down sale?

The "Bring Back the Gilet" Blueprint: Do we need Redknapp, Sherwood and Van der Vaart back in the building to remind this lot what the badge actually means?

Room 101: Dom’s gloves, Porro’s performative badge-thumping.

Plus an epic volley of expletives from Julie and a 6/10 Ange impression. Not to be missed.

Analysis, laughs, irreverence, therapy.

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Do the players care enough? Are they trying? Igor fitting square pegs into round holes again. Is there a way out?

It's straight from the heart.

#COYS #THFC #TTID #Spurs

Host Simon Lipson is joined by f-bomb flinger Julie Welch, eternal optimist-with-a-funeral-face Kevin Acott, and Spurs support group debutant Peter Willis.

On the agenda:

• The match: a study in nothingness.

• Tel and Richy tried. The rest?

• Igor Tudor’s “complex problems”

• Another disallowed goal for the conspiracy theorists.

• Would relegation at least make season tickets cheaper?

• And we scrape the barrel for genuine positive.

Plus: stupid tweets, one sensible one, and a lovely review.

If you’re clinging to Forest and West Ham doing us a favour, this one’s for you.

Hope springs eternal. Sort of.

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- Gooners drubbing aftermath

- Igor hinting at deeper problems

- Porro, Danso back - will that help?

- Conspiracy theories

- Fulham

Irreverence, dodgy predictions, therapy.

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Who played well? Tough one. Who didn't? Easier. Igor's fiirst match in charge was like Thomas's last. Plus ca change. But he's got a whole 11 games to put things right.

Was Micky being disrespectful again? Have the players subconsciously downed tools? Why should they put their faith in a journeyman firefighter?

More Room 101 to lighten the tone, plus some intensely stupid tweets to feast on.

Simon Lipson hosts Spurs journalistic legend Julie Welch, and Rob White, son of Spurs footballing legend John. Together they wrote The Ghost of White Hart Lane and boy, we could use his talent now.

Strap in. It's Nice One Cyril.

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- Spurs v Bottlers on Sunday

- Igor's tactics and selection (not a clue)

- Terry v VVD debate - Ledley was better than both

- Poor old Brennan

Therapy for Spurs fans.

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We bid a tearful farewell to John Heitinga after an era-defining four-week stint, and examine Igor's team of hatchet-faced henchmen.

Also:

• The Penguin Defense: We consign "hands-behind-the-back" defending, amongst other things, to Room 101.

• Fact or Fiction: Did Tim Sherwood use a burner name for TalkSport? And did Son’s dad really ban him from playing for being a millisecond slow?

• Arsenal. Don't worry, we've got your back.

Simon Lipson, Julie Welch, Kevin Acott and Dave Bradshaw get everything right. In a way. It’s messy, it's funny, it’s frantic, it’s Nice One Cyril.

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In this hastily assembled but remarkably polished pod, Kev, Julie, Lee and Simon look into Frank's legacy (yeah, we know), what went wrong and ask where we go from here.

And we've got some selection pointers for the board for the next man.

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With Udogie hobbling off and the squad down to nine fit first-teamers (is that right, Cuti?) we’re officially in "looking over our shoulder" territory.

Inevitably the Poch rumours are back. We discuss the likelihood and desirability.

Also in this episode:

• Flappy: Letting in a trundler before turning into Gordon Banks. Plus ça change.

• Souza & Simons: So good, we wonder why we signed them.

• Dr. Tottenham: Newcastle are at their lowest ebb - 'nuff said?

• Room 101: More footy nonsense for the bin

• Stupid Tweets: So many, so little time.

Simon Lipson, Julie Welch, Lee Brown, and Kevin Acott break down the chaos.

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And we ask: What does Johan Lange actually do?

Plus

• The Vinai Era: Is the new CEO staying "on message," or just managing the decline?

• Academy Paradox: Why are we signing 18-year-old James Wilson from Hearts just to play Academy football while Mikey Moore is tearing it up at Rangers?

• United Away: We look ahead to a massive clash at Old Trafford.

It’s messy, it’s petty, and it’s very Tottenham.

We break down the "moral courage" of Xavi Simons, praise 'man possessed' Palhinha and a veteran-style shift from Archie Gray, and look into the "Giant Redwood" that is Flappy in goal.

Inside this episode:

• The Solanke Saviour: Even an atheist can thank God for that goal.

• The 75-Minute Walkout: Principled protest or utter nonsense?

• Twitter Jury: We shred the week’s most idiotic tweets

• Room 101: Binning off "we go again" and other footballing sins.

• Stat or Fiction: Did VDV really drive home in his kit before the final whistle?

• Man Utd Preview: Which Spurs will show up—the Chalk or the Cheese?

Strap in. We go again.

We examine the performance and ask whether this was progress or just another glorious one-off.

Are Spurs going to suprise us before the window closes? And if so, can they please not surprise us with bloody Raheem Sterling on a free?

City to come. Another easy ride?

With Kev Acott and Simon Lipson

COYS THFC

Plus: Odobert shows promise, Tel gets messed about again and Gallagher’s written off before he’s unpacked. Transfer chat goes suspiciously quiet, ITKs come up empty and we ask whether it’s possible to hate Arsenal too much ahead of City.

Strap in. It’s Nice One Cyril.

- The Dortmund miracle

- Muani downing tools

- Thomas Frank's gabbling

- Transfers

- Burnley

And lots more besides.

#COYS #THFC

We cover baffling tactics, Tel hooked and dumped from the Champions League squad again, Bissouma’s return, Ben Davies’ brutal injury, and the eerie silence from the hierarchy. regarding a failing manager. Where's Levy when you need him?

Dortmund with half a squad, City, United, Newcastle, Arsenal coming up. It's not getting any easier;

⚠️ Slightly shorter episode this week after we discovered, during the edit, that Lee Brown’s microphone had gone full Norman Collier., so we had to can him. Shame, he was bloody good.

Nice One Cyril.

Also, who gives a toss about Gary of Harlow's wet dream Spurs line-up? Kev, as it turns out.

Plus, would defeat to West Ham mean bye-bye Thomas?

Irreverence, speculation, nonsense, therapy.

COYS

Simon, Julie, Kevin and Barry talk green shoots, player meltdowns, transfer gossip, Spurs superstitions, and why supporting this club feels oddly essential despite everything.

Plus some great Spursy anecdotes.

It’s Spurs. It’s confusing. It’s Nice One Cyril.

Another horrible capitulation to Bournemouth , Cupgate, players confronting the fans and the captain aiming a broadside at the hierarchy.

Thomas continues to struggle - what's he trying to do? Do we stick or twist?

Do we expect to be mediocre? Does that expectation sum up who we are as a club and as fans?

Should we throw everything at Villa and be damned?

Martin Chivers - a true great.

Inside the episode:

• Tactical Hostages: Why does Thomas Frank treat a 1-0 lead like a ticking bomb? We discuss the inevitability of the equalizer and the "negative" shift that cost us.

• Mohammed Kudus is out. Who can carry the creative torch?

• Transfer Circus: We separate the genuine January targets from the ITK "idiot" specials. And we ask, Is Johan Lange the architect of our future or the catalyst for our decline?

• The Prodigal Son: Mikey Moore is lighting up Rangers—is it time to trigger the recall and let the kid save our season?

• Reality Check: Would any of our squad even make the bench at City, Arsenal, or Chelsea? (Warning: It’s a short list).

Plus: A quick look at the Poch nonsense and the Bournemouth match.

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Is Thomas Frank just trying not to lose? Will that save his job?

Bilbao hero Brennan Johnson is on his way? Was he good enough? Did we play him out of position? What did his babysitter think of him?

Who broke your heart when they left Spurs?

A quick burst of therapy for Spurs sufferers everywhere.

Spurs win away while playing...not very well. We talk Palace, praise Danso and Archie, worry about Porro, and ask how a team can be top of the away table yet so dreadful at home.

Frank gets pelters for diminishing out EL victory but Eriksen insists Thomas is The Man.

There’s debate about one-footed footballers, modern players falling over too easily, shots from distance becoming extinct — and we announce the winners of Julie Welch’s book for the best Spurs story.

As ever: mildly baffled, oddly optimistic, and deeply Spursy.

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Therapy, nostalgia and mild delusion, as ever.

There’s anxiety about Palace, questions over Brennan, rumours flying, obscure player google searches already underway. Plus — the eternal search for that special Spurs player, Xmas madness in 1990 and Kev's favourite Spurs season.

In this Extra Time edition, Simon Lipson and Kevin Acott wander off the touchline and into the Spurs psyche. The moments you knew were coming and the ones you didn’t. The players we defended far longer than logic allowed. And does a player have to “bleed Spurs” for it to matter? Did Kane? Bale?

Loose, funny, mildly philosophical Spurs therapy — designed to warm you up for the main show.

There’s frustration at Simons being bullied, Kudus trying too much on his own, and substitutions that raised more eyebrows than hope. We also discuss Porro’s comments on Archie Gray, Thomas Frank’s “no quick fix” message, and whether patience is still a viable strategy.

Plus: Sugar flirting with Klopp, Gooners predictably irritating new chant, Liverpool looming at the weekend, and the familiar feeling that Spurs have pulled the rug just as we’d started to stand up.

Bleak, honest, and faintly amused — because what else can you be?

Plus: what are the essential items you have to take to every match at the Lane, Spurs players who couldn't trap a ball - so many - and the unwritten rules of being a Spurs fan.

With Simon Lipson and Kevin Acott.